Jump In

What would change if we crossed the line?
why are we so afraid to enter that world?
I long to belong to you
I long to tell the world things only you know
It gets worse the longer I go without you

When we touch base I understand
But I wonder about it too
Are you afraid for me or the loss
What will we really lose
which is the illusion that which we have
or that which is wanted...

What if we never get a chance to try
What if you grow tired of me
What if this life without you takes me over

Where is the path that i must choose eventually
and once chosen will we regret that we waited so long
Or get there and decide it wasn't worth it

It is what it is you say over and over
but what if it isn't
what if it could be something else

how do we jump
will we ever jump
if i fall will you catch me
be there be here for me

No time

Connections missed
messages left
tag you're it

missing calls
no time to talk
secrets lost

dreams seem real
hold me tight
wake to nothing

hear the anguish
fight the future
doubt in your voice

trying to connect
lost in the distance
no one answers

tell me your story
listen to mine
no news is good news

missing you
missing me
how long can this go on?

Do I end it?
It is what it is
why can't it be different?

Tired of not knowing
Tired of secrets
Tired of waiting

I want the world to know
how much you mean to me

I want my friends to meet
to play together

I want to try a new life
I want to wake up beside you

Missing you
missing the call
missing the talk

Be safe
come back to me
be there for me

Love feels so far away

Life Goes On

So you know how i get when i'm reading and this book was no exception. So it has been three weeks and gosh i really miss you. I know you've tried and it is very frustrating that we haven't connected. I know that if we were more than friends it would be worse but then i'd have more to hold on to as well. I understand why we aren't more than friends and it's ok, really it is. Although sometimes it would be so nice to come home to a different life. To find a way to you and I wonder why we don't make at least small moves towards that other life. So anyway, there i was walking the dog I was thinking about you and missing you and wishing I was allowed to tell you that I love you and have loved you for a very long time. I know that you love me and I know that is why things are as they are. I hope that you don't make any moves because you love me and don't want to make it any harder than it is...or do we stay where we are because we are afraid that it wouldn't be worth it. That the love we feel isn't enough. Is it better for you because it is hidden and dangerous? Do you risk it just enough to feel a thrill or are you as driven towards me as i am towards you? Sometimes i get tired of the secrets and the wishing and I'm glad we are so far apart. A part of me wants to end it all. To walk away from the edge and just forget that we ever got this far. it would be hard but we'd both gone on - after all, we've never really been together and this something is really more nothing than anything. And then I get a call or hear your year old voice mail and the right song comes on...I want to share my latest find with you but I miss the call. I hate missing the call, I hate having a secret, I hate that I am so far away. Not that here is bad because it isn't and I love so much in my life...it's just missing something...it's missing you.